I have never participated in choosing a word to guide my year. I’m not sure where, how, or who began this trend. I’m not even sure how much of a trend it really is, but it is a thing. I love the stamped metal bracelets sporting an inspirational word. But what one word would I choose?
Inspired by an Instagram post I decided this would be the year. With little more than twenty four hours to make my decision, I prayed and went to sleep. When I woke up the first word on my mind is now the word that will guide much of my life in 2019.
In the year and a half since the closing of my business and coming home to recover and evaluate the next chapter of my life, I chose to withdraw from nearly all of society. I didn’t realize it fully at the time, but there was much about my soul that needed healing. Actually during the process I just thought I was being antisocial. My internal voice routinely criticized this behavior, further exacerbating the isolation.
At some point I just relaxed and did whatever felt natural. If I wanted folks in my life, I went out. If I needed solitude, I stayed home. No self condemnation.
Over the holidays something significant shifted. I found myself wanting, no, needing to do something with other people. I’m ready for the next phase of the healing process.
Thus, I will engage with the world around me.Engage with my family.
Engage with my neighbors.
Engage with my community.
Engage with those friends I have let go of and hope they understand.
I believe that my light had been so dimmed by years of stress and struggling for approval and success that I had no choice but to step back to refuel. I am so grateful for the time and opportunity to travel this path. And now I am ready. I step into 2019 full of anticipation and enthusiasm knowing that I as long as I am authentic and allow God’s light to shine through me, it’s going to be a great year.